When you’re not running — but you’re not really here either.
You don’t call it escape.
You call it relaxing.
Unwinding.
“Taking a break.”
You scroll.
You binge.
You clean.
You snack.
You do just enough to stay occupied…
but never enough to feel fully present.
Numbing isn’t dramatic.
It’s quiet.
It wears sweatpants and says “I’m fine.”
But inside?
You haven’t felt joy, grief, anger, or hunger fully in days.
You’re not living — you’re buffering.
It’s not that your life is bad.
It’s that being in it feels overwhelming.
So you find comfort in the neutral zone.
The gray space where nothing touches you too deeply.
Ask yourself:
- What have I been avoiding by “unwinding”?
- What emotion keeps showing up — and getting pushed aside?
- What would happen if I let myself fully feel… just for a moment?
This is the Cushy way.
Presence over sedation.
Pause that restores — not hides.
Feeling that frees you.
You’re allowed to rest.
Just make sure you’re not disappearing.