Anger never shows up quietly.
It slams the door.
It sharpens the tone.
It says things you didn’t mean… but felt in the moment.
And when it leaves—
regret moves in.
That tightness in your chest.
That replay of what you said.
That soft “I didn’t mean to” that comes too late.
So why do we do it?
Why do we lose it, even when we swore we’d stay calm?
Because anger isn’t the first feeling.
It’s the bodyguard.
The protector of something softer underneath—
hurt, fear, shame, exhaustion.
And when we don’t give those softer parts space to speak,
anger does it for them.
Loudly.
Impatiently.
And often, in ways we wish it hadn’t.
But here’s the truth:
You’re not broken because you snapped.
You’re human.
And every time you lose control… is also a chance to reclaim it.
Not by becoming emotionless.
But by becoming aware.
I started noticing what anger felt like before it exploded:
- My jaw would tighten
- My breath would shallow
- My inner dialogue got sharper, fast
That’s where the work is.
Not in being perfect—
but in catching the wave before it crests.
Now, I pause.
I breathe.
I step away, not because I’m weak… but because I’ve seen what happens when I don’t.
You’re allowed to feel it.
You’re just not required to act from it.
That’s the Cushy way.
